It was just weird now that it was done. She thought she would be fine with it; after all, they both wanted it to be as close to theirs as possible. But now, as Lisa looked down at the little bundle in her arms she couldn't help but think:
"This isn't my son."
And biologically, he wasn't. It was only legally that he would be hers.
The biological mother - her wife - lay in the hospital bed that she sat upon, the huge grin she'd worn slipping from her face. The biological father - her own father - stood in a corner of the room behind her, his arms crossed as he watched the three of them. And this baby in her arms - her half brother - would be brought up by her and his mother.
"Lisa, are you alright?" Pam's face was a picture of pure happiness, so why wasn't she happy? She had agreed to the arrangement just like Pam and her dad did. But now that it was done...
She needed to get out of there. Before she knew it her face was being hit by the cool fresh air and she was already crossing the main road away from the hospital. The baby started to cry, causing her to jump; she thought she had left him in the ward with his parents. She felt sick as she cooed and rocked him in a bid to quieten him down, but to no avail. He knew she wasn't his mother. She was his sister, just some older sibling who had no authority over him.
And so he cried. He just kept crying. She tried holding him tight against her chest but he screamed as though she was hurting him. Her eyes darted around for the hospital building but it was nowhere to be seen. Where was she? She needed to get him back to his rightful parents. Back to her father. Back to Pam.
His cries were getting louder. He wanted his mother.
"He's not my son. He's not my son. He's not my..."
"Lisa! Lisa, wake up!"
Lisa sat bolt upright panting. It took a moment for her vision to clear before she realised she was in bed and that Pam was sat next to her rubbing her back, her eyes filled with concern.
"Babe, are you okay?"
Lisa nodded as tears rolled down her cheeks. "It was just a bad dream," she whispered. "Just a bad dream. I'm alright."
The two of them settled back down into bed, Pam holding Lisa tightly from behind, and she felt as Lisa sighed and relaxed into her embrace.
"It's to do with the IVF, isn't it?" Pam knew her all so well.
"Yeah, it is."
"It's okay. We don't have to use your father as a donor. When I think about it now, I wouldn't like it if my dad was to do that for us."
"Don't be silly! We can just use an anonymous donor instead. If I'm honest, I'm rather relieved you don't want us to have your dad's child."
Lisa chuckled. "Yeah, we really didn't think that one through!"
"No, we didn't!" Pam laughed.
"But now how are we going to have a child that's both-"
"Don't worry about that; we can work something out. I love you, and that's all that matters."
"I love you too. And Pam?"